Santas and Monsters

This is a very unusual time for me. It's early December, and normally that means I'm in the throes of having two jobs, late dinners, itchy beards, and the general feeling of being run-down. But something is very strange this year. It is December 3rd and I have not been Santa once. So basically I have Christmas season free time for the first time in 4 years.

Call it 'A Series of Fortunate Events' if you will. First, the November schedule moved Santa's arrival back and shortened the season to 7 weeks. Second, there is a new scheduling software that looked at my availability and said, 'nope!' There is another 'Bye' week that sneaked by. Since I have not been scheduled as the big guy, I've been working as an Elf. And I may have done a little too good of a job of it.

Now I'm worried that I've proven myself to be a better elf than a Santa. There are worse things I guess, I wonder if this is how professional backup quarterbacks feel? Am I destined to having the Christmas season equivalent of giving high-fives to the place kicker and fetching Gatorade.

That is legendary Mizzou quarterback Chase Daniel . . . oh and Drew Brees is there too.

What have I done with copious amounts of free time? Read fiction, of course. I'm currently in the middle of The Forest of Hands and Teeth by Carrie Ryan. And I've started reading The Warrior Heir by Cinda Williams Chima.

Non-Fiction has been largely absent the past few months. So to swing myself back towards the light, I figured I would need something to satisfy my fiction cravings while still being Non-Fiction. And I think I found it. Meet my next selection, The Lady and Her Monsters: A Tale of Dissections, Real-Life Dr. Frankensteins, and the Creation of Mary Shelly's Masterpiece by Rosanne Montillo.

Frankenstein holds a very special place for me. I first read it in 6th grade in a very dark and lonely place in my life. I am looking forward to cracking this one open.

Back to School Night

Last night my wife and I started back to school. We attended our first class of Dave Ramsey's bible-based 9-week course, Financial Peace University.

We tried this out a few years back, after I got laid off and we just got married. We had a lot of success with it. We listened to the audiobooks and after following the advise given we eliminated all of our credit card debt. We felt so good about it that we celebrated . . . by racking up even more credit card debt.

Now, with a year-and-a-half old running around it's time to hunker down and get serious about eliminating debt and increasing our savings.

So, part of our homework for the class is to read chapters from the book, Dave Ramsey's Complete Guide to Money.

Normally I would have some reservations about this, I'm a very impulsive shopper. But this class lets me use spreadsheets to track things and the kit we received had a free pencil . . . pencils and spreadsheets are two of favorite things, I'm in.

Time to get a, peace of the action.

Book Perks

One of the great perks of working at a library is that when it's time to take books out of circulation there is a huge sale, like there was this weekend. And after the sale, whatever does not sell is available for library employees for the low low cost of absolutely free!

So, after picking my way through the fiction section, obliging my compulsion for giant Tom Clancy novels, and selecting a few new sci-fi authors to test out I decided to roll the dice and grab a biography at random, just for fun.

The result was: Rubinstein: A Life, by Harvey Sachs.

Forgive the photo, the camera on phone is dying.

It's the story of Arthur Rubinstein, a classic pianist of the 20th century. I'd describe him more, but I don't want to ruin the surprise.

While this particular book is now off the shelf, there is another if you are interested:

My Many Years, by Arthur Rubinstein.

There is also some music CDs available that I will be checking out as well:

Complete concert Carnegie Hall 19 April 1953
Arthur Rubinstein Chopin-nocturnes

Losing my Addictions

I believe in God. If you don't, then that is your right. But for me, whenever someone asks me if I believe in God my answer is always the same: No one could live the life I have and not believe in God. 

But this is not a post about God or religion. I just think it is amazing how God can throw things at you right when you need them.

Recently, we went out to the sand hills of Western Nebraska to celebrate my in-law's 40th wedding anniversary. When we got back I scrolled through all the pictures we had taken. there were plenty of pictures of the little girl, several of her cousins, aunts, uncles, grandma and grandpa, but then I started looking for pictures of my wife and I. There were 0. I asked my wife about this and she said she didn't like have her picture taken. I concur.

I don't like pictures of me because they show me how fat I am.

My wife and I have talked on several occasions about how we need to change our lifestyle to be healthier but nothing ever seems to stick. We told ourselves after this mini-vacation that we would start something new. . . we didn't.

So last night, when my wife asked if I wanted to go for a walk and I declined, we ended up sitting on the couch instead. Somehow, the TV was navigated to a Michael Mosley program on PBS.

God bless PBS.

The show was about exercise and how researchers think we all have it wrong. We stopped and listened. An hour later we both were disgusted with ourselves and our sedentary lifestyle. 

As a result, my wife and I are both starting to plan out our new routines. She wants to do Gluten-Free, I want to go the Paleo diet route. Crazy-talk about gym memberships started spewing from our mouths.

That's all well and good. But deep down, hidden in the shadows, my addiction snickers at my aspirations. 

You see, I am addicted to Coke (Coca-Cola, that is, soda, lets not start any rumors). And every attempt I have made to break this addiction has failed, or has succeeded only to be destroyed shortly thereafter with a momentary sip that sends me right back where I started.

I know that any attempt at a healthy lifestyle is dead in the water if I don't fix this before. So as of this weekend I am starting. again, to break being the Coke junkie.

In the meantime, I have picked up a couple non-fiction books to help fuel the diet plans:

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Gluten-Free Cooking, by Jean Duane

and,

The Paleo Slow Cooker: Healthy Gluten-Free Meals the East Way, by Arsy Vartanian

It's about to get Weird

I remember being in 4th grade (we'll say 1986ish) when, after being excluded from another round of Red Rover, a group of us 'odd kids' got together and realized that we had something in common: a fondness of the music of Weird Al Yankovic. Thus, our Weird Al Yankovic club was born. Of course, all we really did was sit around and listen to parodies. But it was a group to be a part of and that was something I really needed.

This Wednesday, 27 years later, Weird Al Yankovic will be performing live on 9th street in Columbia, MO.

Who has 2 thumbs and will be singing along in the crowded summer heat? This guy!

In honor of the greatness that is Weird Al Yankovic, and the sheer amount of awesome his albums have produced over the year, meet the next selection: Weird Al: The Book by Nathan Rabin.

There are no words to describe the nerd nirvana that will sweep over 9th street when 'Yoda' is played. I'm so excited.

Art imitating Video Games

With excitement growing over the release of Sony's PS4 and Microsoft's XBOX One, I felt it my duty as a video game junkie to create a Video Game book list.

I've already posted about Extra Lives: Why Video Games Matter, and I loved it, so let me present another Video Game related addition to the list: The Art of Video Games: from Pac-Man to Mass Effect by Chris Melissinos.

This was my first art book and it was fascinating to see the evolution of game design. Sadly, I have not played Mass Effect yet, something I intend to fix soon.

Road Trip!

Memorial Day weekend and the unofficial start of summer has arrived. For me, that means 4 entire days off from work(s) and a road trip up to Red Oak, Iowa for my nephew's birthday. And for the first time in a long, long time that I have not checked out a book on CD for the car. Instead, I have 3 eBooks and 3 mp3 audiobooks loaded onto my Nexus 7 and I'm ready to plug it into the car and go.

I'm still trying to come down from my eBook addiction, but I'm not doing a very good job of it. I blame Lee Child, as I was recently introduced to the Jack Reacher novels.

Memorial Day is also a sad time, it means football is still about 4 months off. That's scary.

In an effort to fight off football withdrawal, I've been working on a reading list of football books for the library. It's a lot of work, but friends don't let friends watch hockey.

I think it would be a little unfair to add all the books on my list to the Man Vs Nonfiction project, so I'm going to add just one:

Keep your Eye Off the Ball, by Pat Kirwan.

Pat Kirwan just so happens to be a well respected NFL analyst for CBS and spent some time coaching in the NFL. I'm very excited to crack this one open this weekend. He starts off talking about filling out a roster for a football game like you would at a baseball game . . . You have my full and complete attention Mr. Kirwan.

The NFL Draft and a Death in the Family

This past weekend was great . . . then it was awful.

The 2013 NFL draft kicked off last Thursday night and went through Saturday evening. 7 glorious rounds of bliss. The NFL Draft means something very special to me. It combines my love of football with my love of spreadsheets.

When I was a kid my brother and I would sit in front of the TV with a pad of paper and a pencil. Why? I don't know, I think statistics and tracking things was soothing for me, even back then. Of course this weekend it was my laptop for tracking and my tablet for researching.

And what do I do with this great spreadsheet? Do I submit it to ESPN? Show it off to all my friends and family? Print it off and hang it on my wall? No. I store it away in a obscure folder on my laptop, never to be heard from again.

And after the 7th round was over, with the Tight End from South Carolina going to Indy with the last pick, I settled down onto my couch, picked up my Xbox controller, and was consumed by terror.

After 6 long years, my Xbox 360, my faithful companion, displayed the tell-tale sign of failure, the Red Ring of Death. I did what I could to nurse it back, but alas, my Xbox is dead. I'm sad, but when I think about it, 6 years is a long time for a piece of hardware to last. Especially one that has been used as heavily as mine has.

But I can;t be too upset, I've had plenty of books to read.

I've been on a e-Book tear as of late, reading The Gate Thief by OSC and a couple of 3-book series. My non-fiction project has been brought to a serious halt. I blame the library's new e-book interface that makes it way too easy to check out. I'll get back on the horse soon, just as soon as I finish the China Mieville book, Kraken. . . and then the non e-book (non e-Book? Is there a better word here? Real Book? Solid Book? Actual Book?) Ted Kosmatka book, Prophet of Bones, that I have on hold.

When I do return to the non-fiction area I think it's time to alter my selection process. Plus, I'm pretty sure there have been some additions to the stacks I need to account for.

Pay it Forward

Snow storms are getting rare in Missouri. To the point where even the threat of 2 inches will shut down schools and cause runs on bread and milk. So when 'Winter Storm Q,' by the way, naming winter storms is dumb . . . unless you name them all Victor Fries or Robert Drake, I'd be OK with that, anyway, when Q came along and dropped 11 inches on Columbia, this town went post-apocalyptic. I kept waiting to see Denzel Washington stroll by to shoot some cats . . . Book of Eli? Anyone? I liked it . . .

11 inches followed by ice is one thing, but the fact that it came down so incredibly fast is what threw everyone for a loop. This was compete madness. My attempt to pick my daughter up from daycare was foiled by my arch-nemesis, Gravity. Snow covered hills, great for sledding, not so great for front wheel drive.

My decision was this: turn around, get home, and assess the situation further. After a slow and treacherous drive in whiteout conditions I finally made it to the entrance to my neighborhood. Foiled again! Curse you gravity! To get to my street you have to go down a hill and back up.

You remember  the Wii Fit Ski Jump Game? Imagine that, only instead of jumping at the end and it being awesome, instead you just get stuck with spinning tires and that burning rubber smell. Not nearly as fun. Add to the awesomeness the complete jerk that, when he got his giant white van stuck, in the middle of the road, at the bottom of the hill, decided to just leave it and walk home. Thanks dude.

So, since everyone was at a stand-still and no one was going anywhere for a while, I pulled my car to the curb (out of the way, see? Are you paying attention white vanny jerk-guy?) and started hoofing it home. 2, maybe 3 blocks, not a bad walk even with snow and sleet. My wife joined me on foot as she was 3 cars down.

So there we were. At home, out of the mess. No cars, no little girl. Not cool.

The babysitter said everything was fine on her end and, worst case scenario, Emma could spend the night there. Reassured, it was time to suit up. I put on my sweatpants, the jeans my wife won't let me wear in public, Bass Pro hoodie, and the boots I use when I'm Santa. Let's do this. On a mission, we set out with our trusty snow shovels, ice scrappers, and a bag of ice melt with the sole intention of getting at least 1 of our cars to the house. On the way we meet up with our neighbors who are headed down the hill to help.

I love the fact that so many people were out to help. Random people, no last names, just Toms, Robs, and Adams appearing out of nowhere to lend a hand. We cleared at least 15 cars, digging them out, getting them unstuck, helping them get out of the middle of the road, getting them around the white van (jerk) and pushing them up the hill. One of those cars we got up the hill was my wife's. After doing this for 3 hours, we all needed a break.

After a nap, some hot chocolate, and a couple of coughing fits to get all the exhaust fumes out of my lungs, it was time to get back at it. It was almost 6 at this point, and luckily, someone who will not be named called that van in and had it towed . . . that helped out immensely. A few more cleared cars and I was able to get my car back home.

With both cars back we discussed how we should get Emma back home. Now, I have 2 feelings about this. 1. I want my daughter home safe and sound. 2. I don't want to get stranded on the road somewhere with her in the back seat. Our babysitter assured us it was no problem to have her spend the night. She also mentioned her street was a mess with abandoned cars littered everywhere. So we decided that leaving her there was best.

I don't feel bad about leaving her there. She was safe, she spends over 8 hours there every day during the week, and getting stuck with her would be awful. That being said, I also feel horrible about it. You would think a night without kids would be a lively affair, but no, we did nothing that night. Nothing but send text messages back and forth to the babysitter to see how she was doing. then a somber march to bed at 9 o'clock.

Emma did just fine. When Friday morning came I went off to work while my wife prepared to go get her. I got a text that she had picked Emma up. When we asked how much we owed the babysitter for watching her overnight she said not to worry about it, pay it forward. Her neighbors cleared off her driveway because they know she has 4 kids of her own and her husband was away on business. Sometimes, people are just awesome.

Sure enough, a half hour after the text, I got the call. She was stuck in the middle of our babysitter's road. Luckily, she was able to get into the driveway and our good friends Leigh and Michael that live right down the road from the babysitter's were able to get there in his 4-wheel-drive and give them a lift home. So now, everyone is home, and we only down one car.

Pay it Forward. I'd like to say we paid it forward plenty by helping out all those cars down and back up the hill. But I don't think Pay it Forward has a 1-to-1 cost. It's more of a way of doing things. Something I need to incorporate more.

And, of course, I should get a book on it too.

After a simple catalog search, I'd like you to meet selection #19: 1,000 Mitzvahs by Linda Cohen. Mitzvah is a Hebrew word meaning an act of human kindness.

Stay safe out there folks, and remember to avoid the white vans that life puts in your way.

wooden boxes, magic clouds, and minor apocalypses

2012 was not the end of the world, *and there was much rejoicing*, but for me, 2013 sure does feel like the apocalypse (albeit a minor one).

Work is absolutely crazy . . . we'll leave it at that.

Throw on top of that a little flu/plague infestation, a garage door revolt, and a leaky basement. needless to say it's been a little stressful.

In times like this, the best solution to stress is a nice distraction by a good book. And while my instincts are pulling me towards Tolkien or Orson Scott Card, I'm looking at you The Lost Gate, this time I've decided to take a different route. I've checked out Atlas Shrugged, by Ayn Rand.

I'm a little embarrassed to admit I've never read Atlas Shrugged, I tried to listen to the audiobook last Fall as my wife and I made the trek to Western Nebraska, sadly, she nixed that plan after about 20 miles.

A little Fiction vacation is just what I need. But I'm not totally abstaining from Non-Fiction.

I've made 2 selections for the Non-Fiction quest:
First, Children's Furniture Projects by Jeff Miller. I do not have the skill or patience to make my daughter a toy chest, but I can at least make photocopies of the plans for one, it's the thought that counts right?

Also, Management Strategies for the Cloud Revolution, by Charles Babcock. I teach two classes at the library, one about using Android devices and the other about current mobile technologies. In both of these classes I mention cloud storage and I don't think I'm explaining it in a way that they are able to understand it, hopefully this will help with that.

The gift that keeps on giving

The holidays are over, The Sickness has run amok through my household and everyone is finally on the up and up, and college bowl season is officially done after that truly awful national championship game. That means it's back to the grindstone! And I'm pretty excited about my next selection: Guide to Missouri Vegetable Gardening by James A. Fizzell. 

I orginally got this book for my wife, but after reading it I am so pumped for starting a garden I can hardly wait till Spring. I have a tiller on the way and I am going to go nuts!